Still stickin' to it!

So I haven't written in a while to say the least. I am still sticking to my new eating habits however I just can't keep on that Metformin. I refuse to pass my life away staying at home all the time because my medicine makes my day unpredictable. It also made me so nauseous that I just couldn't muster up the appetite to eat any food or even drink water which led to many migraine attacks because of dehydration which are just the hardest to get rid of.

I have lost 6lbs and most importantly have kept it off in the past 3 mos. The not so good part is that I haven't lost any more than that. My eating habits are much better but my body simply cannot lose weight without the help of medications due to my PCOS. So I'm going back to my docs to see what my options are if there are any.

More and more I'm feeling well....depressed I guess. I feel as though I am wearing a fat suit but can't seem to find the zipper to take it off. I don't know how to buy clothes for myself because I still see myself in pre-pregnancy form. So I buy nothing. I hesitate spending much time in the mirror as to not look at myself, because it's just a reminder of something I can never have. (at least for now) The weird thing is that I seriously do not see the weight on other people. I look at them and really and truly only see their face, their soul and their personality but for some reason I can't seem to look past that for myself and I just don't know why. There are people who accept themselves for who they are and move on, I just wish I was one of those people.

Not only do I see the fat, but I feel it tremendously. I feel it when I sleep because it pushes on my lower back and I feel it on my hips when I walk. I tire easily which just leads to me not wanting to exercise and yet I rarely sit down at home because there's always stuff to do, you'd think I would be a toothpick because of that.

So this is where I am at today, 3 months after my first and last post. I don't know where I'm headed yet but I am determined to get where I want to be....to a thinner, healthier, happier....ME!